Before I was a mom...

I am not a writer, but I would like to honour my mom this mother's day with an open letter to let her know just how much I appreciate everything she does and is still doing in my life...

Before I was a mom...

Before I was a mom, it was easy for me to judge other mom. I will not let my kids do these, and you won’t see my kids act like that. Yes, it was easy to judge, even my own mom but now that I am a mom. I finally realized how much I don’t know about how hard it was to be in your shoes…

* November, 2006

It was hard for me to imagine 

that I will be going to Canada soon and be far from you :'(

Before I was a mom, I thought that you were too much of a worrier. I thought that I knew it all and that you meant well but you were just a bit paranoid of everything around. Now, I realize just how much being a mom meant that you never think just for yourself, you decide things thinking about everyone around you and thinking of yourself last.  Yes, I am a bit paranoid too, now that I am also a mom and I can definitely say that motherhood has kept me up a lot of nights worrying about things that might happen years from now. Thank you for all the times that you actually came to fetch me during those late nights with dad in tow, I never considered that you might be tired, after a long days work and all the things in between work and home. I was selfish and I realized now just how much sacrifice you did, how you and dad had to get up from your beds, resting and having to come to me just to make sure that I don’t take the public transportation because I am that important to you. I also remember when I had a rift with my best friend you never underestimated our fight and my feelings even when it was something of a kid’s issue. I remember you went with me to her house for the “talk”, I really appreciate that. You showed me with that action that my feelings does matter and that no matter how silly it looks, you’d be there with me up until the end. Thank you for showing me my worth with those simple acts, I now carry with me the confidence of my self worth and no one can pull me down because of it.

* December 2007

Mom and Kimi

Sleepless Nights helping me out with Kimi...Thank You!

Before I was a mom, I would go with you to your nights out thinking that my mom sure knows how to have fun while daddy just enjoys home. I thought it was just an extra but now that I myself am a mom, I realize how important those nights outs are. It actually kept me sane. Thank you for teaching me balance. That yes, life do suck sometimes, but you can’t control what life throws at you, BUT, you can control how you react to it. I know how to deal with difficulties because of you. There is strength in all of us.

* December 2007

Mom and Kimi

Proud Grandmama

Before I was a mom, I thought how much different you treat each of us. We are all your kids and I would wonder at the back of my head, why you treat one of us like that, while the other, another way. Now that I have two of my own, I know it is hard to treat them the same. It is not because you love one more than the other, but because we are all individuals and each has to be treated differently because each of us has different needs. You know our needs more than us and I can tell you that you did right by all of us.

* August 2008

Me and Kimi

I am now far from you, I miss you all in the Philippines

Before I was a mom, I would feel bad when I see you and dad argue. I would think that, next time I wouldn’t be like that when I do get married. It was easier said than done. I am just grateful to both of you that despite the huge difference in your views, you have shown us that we do argue, but we are all in the same team. No one will walk out and in the end we are a family. Thank you for that security and because of that I grew up with a positive view of family despite all the negatives I have seen in other families around us. I learned a lot from seeing you both work through your differences and because of that I know that when you argue it means you are trying to work thing out because you care for each other.

* May 2009

Mom with Kenzo and Kimi

This is the first time you met Kenzo

Before I was a mom, I thought that you were too nice and I will not let anybody get away if they cross the line. Now, I realize that you were right once again. You don’t need to win every single time because not all battles are worth winning. There are a lot of things and feeling considered and being nice doesn’t mean you are weak. It just means that you are the better person. You have shown me that doing right is better than getting ahead. I know that it is rare in this world thank you for living the example.

* March 2011

Four Generations

I was finally able to go home for a visit

I know that there is no such thing as a perfect mom and I am sure that you sometimes doubt if you ever did a good job. I am here to tell you that you did more than a good job. If I were to end up half of the mom you are, I will be a proud mother to Kimi and Kenzo. Thank you for being the selfless mom that you are and I want to tell you that I appreciate it a lot. We love you.

Image From Full of Great Ideas: Christmas in September 

** The only thing better than having you for a MOM

is my children having you for a Grandma. **

Just my sentiment. Enough Said.

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY!!!

A Tribute to my Grandparents

All my memories of my grandparents are of them together.

We lived quite far away from each other and for those few times that they do visit and stayed at our place. I was always amazed how they made being married look so natural and something that I'd like for myself. If one of them enters the room, you can definitely count on the fact that the other one would be there a few minutes later. They just love being in each other's company.

When I got word that my grandmother passed away. I immediately thought of my grandfather and how he must be feeling. A little over 2 weeks after her death, my grandfather also passed away. It was sad but I also felt that they just could't bear being apart and it was how they'd want it... together, right until the end.

Their memorial service was held today at Dallas, Texas. I wish I was there to be with them for the last time, I did a presentation for their memorial service/ viewing and it was really emotional doing this little video for them.

Thank you Grandparents for being such a role model,

I look to you both... I Love You

* * * * *

GOODBYE ANGKONG and AMAH

WE WILL MISS YOU A LOT

I'm Thankful...

I've been quite busy these past few weeks...

First and Foremost, I am...

Thankful for the busyness because my family from the Philippines (and Netherlands), went out of their way to find a niche in their busy schedules to come here to be with me...

I would like to post something about thankfulness...

Stress is always a part of life. How we handle them is what matters...
It's easy to compare and complain...

to see what we lack, instead of what is already there in our life.

This time around, I decided to be intentional in certain things in my life.

Instead of wishing for more, (and being thanksgiving) I decided to focus on things to be thankful for...

For my hubby...
Thank you for filling my life with love and inspiration
especially giving me kids who gave more meaning to our lives

For my in laws...
for helping us with things here in the house.
taking care of the kids and loving them in their own ways

For my Ong Family...
Thank you for the love and support throughout the years,
I am what I am right now because of you guys...

For my Friends...
Thanks for the shoulder to lean on, an ear who's there to listen
...a helping hand when I need someone. For just being there to extend any help without me needing to say it. (you know who your are guys!)

For our home...
It brings us a place where we can be together and add memories as a family. A place of security.

For work...
I am thankful for the flexibility and giving me a bit of respite from home so that I come back a better mom.

For problems...
for it made me a better and stronger person. It made me realize that life is never fair but there is always a reason why it happens. It actually bought me to sit up and take notice of what really is important. 

For each day...
It meant that I am here for a purpose and a chance to right what I have done wrong from my past.

...these are the ones that are on top of my head right now,

ANYWAY...
Belated
HAPPY THANKSGIVING

From a Mother to being a daughter once again

It was nice to be a daughter once again. Not having to be the one taking care of everyone.

It was refreshing to be the one being taken care of this time around.

I didn't realize how much I miss my mom until we saw each other last September.

...How she listened, comforted and just loved me with all my imperfections. No judgement.

I wish you guys were not so far away...

Beyond all lessons, beyond the model she provided, 

my mother gave me a parent's ultimate gift;

she made me feel lovable and good. 

She paid attention. 

She listened; 

she remembered what I said.

She did not think me perfect, but she accepted me, without qualification.

-Fredelle Maynard

MISS YOU GUYS

Motherhood Choices

I admit that motherhood is not a walk in the park, yet it is the most rewarding role I could ever ask for. It`s hard to make decisions when you know that every decision may, and will, affect (you and...) your kids in the future. I have compiled some decisions we had so far and what we got from these decisions.

* * *

Some of you may roll your eyes on co-sleeping at age 2 and 4 but I really love having them close to me while they still want me. I know that soon enough, they will want their space.

CO-  SLEEPING

#1 Waking up to see Kenzo looking down at me, smiling and raining me kisses to start my day

#2 After a hard day's work, I love to see them sleeping peacefully in our bed and cuddling them. Makes me forget the day's fight and shouting matches. It's a perfect way to end the day, seeing them sleep makes me almost forget how active they were earlier.

#3 I love how Kimi instinctively reaches out in the middle of the night, still asleep, to look for the warmth of my body, and sighing contentedly upon finding me.

#4 I just love having hubby, Kimi and Kenzo within my arm's reach, makes me feel that everything I need are in this little space we call bed.

#5 Doing prayers with the kids at night time, it is so funny what comes out of the kids and I just love making small talks before they go to sleep.

* * * 

Doing part time work has it perks although sometimes I wish I could start my path toward whatever career path I want to take, to get a full time job that actually make a big contribution towards our monthly bill and to actually set aside something significant for our future, but we decided that the kids needs me more right now and that we can work on a budget with whatever salary we rake in at this point.

* December 2012

PART TIME JOB vs FULL TIME

#6 I get to see how they do day in and day out, which can be a bit too much for me sometimes but can be rewarding when you see them reach a milestone with your very own eyes.

#7 Shuttling them for play dates during the office hours and getting together with the other mommies and kids to compare notes share motherhood experiences. This is priceless and we can only do that during office hours...

#8 I get a bit of time in the office to re-energize and miss the kids so that I can be a better mom when I get home. Mom can get overloaded too when the kids is with you 24/7. A bit of grownup and office setting goes a long way to keep my sanity intact.

#9 I love taking the kids to places they can learn outside the confines of the classroom. Weekday means a little less crowd and more fun for them and less stress for me. Parks, Malls, Movies, Play Areas, Zoo, Farms... 

#10 I learned to do fun things on a budget, less work, less pay so you get to be creative with the budget you can work with ;).

* * *

School time is fast approaching and as much as I love Summer with all it's freestyle scheduling, school time means routine and we try to limit what goes in as the kid's extra curricular activity from September- June.

* 2011 Skating in Killarney

EXTRA-CURRICULAR(s)

#11 I know church is not an extra-curricular but we decided that Sunday mornings are our church days and with me volunteering in the kids ministry this Summer in Kimi's class, I am quite confident that she will be in good hands and learn a lot of Bible truths every week. I know I did...

#12 One extra-curricular activity guaranteed (if I can fit more, why not?). I signed up Kimi to skating lessons, which she has been asking for, this coming September and I have to juggle my schedule a bit to fit this in. It may take awhile for me to get another activity so as not to load her up too much and because I need some time to fit volunteering which is required from her school as well :(. 

#13 Chinese lessons. We decided to enroll Kimi for chinese classes on Saturdays and I might volunteer on the same organization just to help my chinese help instead of just loitering and waiting on the side.

#14 Choir. I am waiting for the church bulletin to print out an opening for the kid's choir and hopefully Kimi will be able to make it to the the age range.

#15 Sun-dates. A Special famliy activity on the weekend. Be it Satur-date or a Sun-date. 

How about you? What are your choices for your family and how did it affect your family? I'd love to get more ideas...

* * * * *

Children are only young once.

Polish Proverb

Our Engagement- 6 years ago...

2006.05.14

We got engaged.

Customary Chinese traditions were followed.

I wasn't much into blogging so I'd like to collage document it in my blog this year to remember that important event in our life.

A strong relationship starts with two brave people who are ready to sacrifice anything for one another.

-unknown

* * * * *

Karl and Mel Engagement

2006

A Candle for you...

One of my bestfriends in college sent me this photo...

"I lit a candle for you in prayer at church today."

It was nice to be remembered, it was nicer to be included in someone's prayers.

It means that I am in their hearts, as well as their mind.

Aaaaaw. Mega Touched.

Thanks Hannah :)

* * * * *

Expect to have hope rekindled. 

Expect your prayers to be answered in wondrous ways.

The dry season in life does not last. 

The spring rains will come.

- Sarah Ban Breathnach

Kimichua-ism regarding surprise for Mother`s Day

I was fishing for some information as to what is Kimi up to for the mother`s day presentation this year..

Mommy: Kimi? What are you planning for Mother`s Day?
Kimi:  It`s a surprise. I won`t tell you.

Then, she proceeded to sing a song which was suspiciously related to mommies...

Mommy: Kimi, is that the song you are singing for Mother`s Day?
Kimi: Yes mommy, this is just one song! I am not going to sing the other ones...
(She can`t seem to keep a surprise...)


Next Day

Kimi singing another new mommy song...

Mommy: Kimi, what are you singing?
Kimi: Nothing! Teacher said I need to practice... I need lots of practice!

* * * * *
When you have doubts if you are becoming just a mom. Remember this,

 2009 * 2010 Mother's Day

You rock a sobbing child  without wondering if today`s world  is passing you by,

because you know you hold tomorrow tightly in your arms,

- Elder Neal A. Maxwell


* * * HAPPY MOTHER`s MONTH! ***

Kimichua-ism about Growing and Marriage

For us kids grow way too fast and I always commented to my babies that they are growing way too fast

One day, Kimi suddenly decided to voice out her feelings

Kimi: Mommy?
Mommy: Yes?
Kimi: It's been 7 days already and Kenzo is still a baby, he doesn't grow AT ALL!

* * * * *

Kimi: Mommy, when I grow up who is going to be my other mommy and daddy?

I figured she was asking about the ìn-laws`...

Mommy: What do you mean?

Kimi: Just like Nana and Kong Kong

Mommy:  it depends, if you marry Justin (referring to her play mate), you have Auntie Glenda and Uncle Warren as your new parents
Kimi thought for awhile
Kimi: Who am I going to marry?
Mommy: You marry someone who will make you happy...
Kimi:  Ooooh! Daddy makes me happy.
That settles it then we will have the same in laws in the future LOL!

* * * * *

** Thanks to my mom who always listen to me about even the tiniest stuff and never told me that any of my concern then (...and now), was irrelevant...

Listen earnestly to anything your children want to tell you, no matter what.

If you don`t listen eagerly to the little stuff  when they are little,

they won`t tell you the big stuff when they are big, because to them all of it has been big stuff.

-Catherine M. Wallace

Easter Egg Hunt @ Killarney

Easter Egg Hunt at Killarney was a wee bit early for us at 9 am after a late night before, so it was a bit of an effort waking up Kimi and Kenzo. I almost gave up and was about to call it a day and just make it a regular day ahead but I am so glad we pushed through.

A bit late to arrive, I was surprised to see people lining up in every corner of the rooms and rushed to get a paper bag and a sticker sheet so that Kimi can design her bag while waiting in line for the Easter Egg Proper.

* Little Egg Hunters: Kalen, Kimi and Justin

The Easter Egg Hunt was just a couple of minutes but it was really fun with lots of eggs to collect. The pursuit was for a couple of special eggs that can be exchanged for the special prize. Each kid gets to exchange their eggs for a loot bag so as not to make anyone feel bad for not getting any prize at all.

* Egg-change Booth

* Mary had a little Lamb... This is the special prize...

After the hunt, we went for the face painting which was quite popular with the kids as well.

* Face Painting Must Haves

* Kenzo very suspicious of the guy painting on his cheeks

* Carrot for Kenzo

This is all we can manage for Kenzo right now...

* Kimi's Turn

* My Little Bunny

A Few jumps on the Bouncy Castle and it was time to wrap up the hunt with some group pictures.

* Gymnasium

* Poster Picture

* Happy Bunny

Let us not forget that the real reason we are celebrating is that Jesus died for us and rose again.

HAPPY EASTER!

I love the chorus from Jesus, Take the Wheel by Carrie Underwood

* * * * *

Jesus take the wheel

Take it from my hands

Cause I can't do this on my own

I'm letting go

So give me one more chance

Save me from this road I'm on

Jesus take the wheel

* * * * *

"For I know the plans I have for you", declares the Lord, 

"plans to prosper you and not to harm you,

plans to give you hope and a future."

Jeremiah 29:11

Life as an Architecture (Fine Arts) Student...and more

One of the best times I had when I was younger was my college years.

The best of both worlds, I got a bit of freedom and  a lot less responsibilities to worry about than now. Those carefree moments when life was stretched out right in front of you. 

I was a student of Interior Design, University of Santo Tomas then, and like Jerald, I can perfectly relate as to what he was talking about regarding plates and endless sleep. Sleeping over at a friend's to finish a plate to be submitted the next day. The cramming. Actually, sleeping over is not actually sleeping but trying to listen late at night on the radio while finishing our plate with cups after cups of coffee to keep us awake. Alarming our mobiles to make sure that we are informed when the time is almost running out or in case we accidentally slept out of sheer exhaustion. 

Graduation was both a happy and sad occasion. Happy to see that we are somewhat in the finish line for school days but sad when we realized that we won't be seeing as much of our friends as we were used to.

I didn't have someone significant during my college years but I would really be swept off my feet if my boyfriend did this during our graduation...

It was a real treat to see Beato Angelico in the video. It was quite new when we left for graduation. The familiar hang out tables and chairs as well as the new uniforms. I feel like it was so long ago... Thanks for this video, it somewhat transported me back to my yesteryear as a Fine Arts Student.

* * * * *

To Jerald and Angela, I don't know you but I definitely wish you all the best 

* * * * *

Everybody deserves someone 

who makes them look forward to tomorrow

-Anonymous

First of Spring...

Spring 春... 

(... a little info, my siblings and I shares a common Chinese name which is "spring" 

followed by another word,
while Kimi and Kenzo got the word "冬," winter' in both their Chinese name)

* * * * *

I just love how Spring makes each day (light) a little longer 

and each night (darkness) a bit more shorter than Winter.

Simply put, Spring symbolizes of hope and new beginnings

My favorite? The cherry blossoms :) I can't wait for it to come out in full bloom. We passed by one at the entrance of her school and she commented last year that it looked like popcorn, so true! Let us see how she sees them this year.

* * * * *

... on the side, since we are talking about new things...
Kimi tried to create something from another thing

* Mommy's earrings into Kimi ring...

* * * * *

Kimi: Look mommy, this look like your wedding ring!

True... Kids are way too observant sometimes... :)

* * * * * 

No matter how long the winter, 

spring is sure to follow. 

 ~Proverb

Be Still... Give Thanks

Source: ... and Spiritually Speaking

Quote by: Marianne Johnson Hodson

...and as for praying

I am trying to teach Kimi to pray every night to give thanks

I am just amused at some of her prayers

Kimi: Dear Jesus, Thank you for my home... (okay, mommy nodding)

Thank you for the window, the door, the bed, the night table.... (uhmm, interior designer in the making?)

* * *

Kimi: Dear Jesus, Bless Papa, Mama, Kimi, Kenzo, Nana, Kong Kong...

Jesus, pls make Tai Ma (Great Grandmother) well....

Mommy: Kimi? Why are you praying for Tai Ma to get well? She is not sick

Kimi: Mommy, she's old.... (uhmm, that is not a sickness...)

* * *

Be Thankful in all circumstances, 

for this is God's will 

for you who belong to Christ Jesus

1 Thessalonians 5:18

Live life to the fullest

Life can never be full of ups as it is not life but maybe a fairy tale. Problems and trials are going to be a part of it one time or another. When I was young, I thought that life was stretched far right ahead of me and that there will be a long way, then I woke up and found myself in the present with a good years already behind me. Where did the years go?

I am still amaze how fast time flies and how the kids are growing right before my very eyes. 

...and the only thing we can do is make the most out of each day and love them even when they are grating on our nerves.

I love this poem in my past scrap page back in 2009

* 2009- Kimi at one year and 5 months

... and my little ball of energy :)

* 2011- December

* * * * *

So teach us to  number our days,

that we may gain a heart of wisdom.

Psalm 90:12

One vote a day will help me in a way :)

I entered a wee bit late so i am not expecting.

CLICK TO VOTE